So 10 month have passed, since I wrote my last blog entry. Many things have happened in the mean time. But no advances in the construction of the Hack-Shack. Actually I made 2 steps back…
First things first. So, last year in November, I returned by car from Mexico to the hack-shack, making an awesome road trip of 3 days – by the way, I recommend highly road trips in Mexico. You discover many beautiful landscape and hilarious food – Unfortunately I didn’t find any advances made to the hack-shack. An inner voice became more and more difficult to ignore.
I returned to Mexico without being able to meet Gabriela during my stay. In December we ran over the total construction budget and there were neither plastered walls, nor a roof. With a heavy heart I had to pull the trigger when spending the budget’s last dime and ended the working relationship with Gabriela and Francisco.
That step took me a huge amount of courage. I avoided the decision for way too much time. It felt, as if I was attempting against my own dream, committing meaning-of-life-suicide. I scrambled around the decision for months. Running out of money didn’t let me any other choice though.
The construction was abandoned and left to wind and weather. I had no strength to go and check on the house during 10 months. Simple fear of facing the facts. I kept myself busy with building up kessel – our solar water heater business – and postponed any type of topic related to the construction.
In June I got finally my act together and started detailing the plans for the electrical instalación and hydraulic piping with Cinthia – a friend architect, with experience in straw bale building and other alternative solutions – so I could finally apply the plaster on top of the Sandbags.
I got into contact with Josué and Octavio, two architects from Oaxaca with experience in bioconstruction. After a few Skype calls and a visit of some projects in Oaxaca, we decided to work together for the continuation of the Hack-Shack.
And now I am back in La Ventana, in the car with Octavio… driving up the sandroad heading towards the Hack-Shack, making the last turn around the last Torrote tree and all I see are shattered sandbags and a crumbled down building…
For a second a deep sadness overcame my entire body. In my mental worse-case scenario I had anticipated such a shocking view. Nevertheless seeing it for real, made me speechless.
Within the next 20 seconds I analyzed what has to be done and nailed down the ideas on the next steps to proceed the construction. My left brain hemisphere was overdriving all my emotions; as always in my life. I discussed the next steps with Octavio and Edgar – our faithful contractor – to align.
I went to bed later on and woke up so frustrated the next morning. I just wanted to go home to Switzerland. I am broke, my house crumbled down, our start-up Kessel is not profitable yet, I messed up with my relationships and anyway I never achieve anything in my life…